**This blog contains adult language.**
Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!! This is a recap blog which means I read the book and tell you everything that happens so you don't have to read it yourself. Do NOT continue to read unless you want to know what cold-hearted-bitch move the twins made this book.
From the Back of the Book: The end of romance...The Wakefield twins' older brother, Steven, is heartbroken. His girlfriend, Tricia Martin, no longer seems interested in him. She breaks their dates and doesn't return his calls. Steven can't understand why Tricia's feelings have changed so suddenly. Jessica is thrilled that Steven isn't dating Tricia anymore. She sees it as the perfect opportunity to pair him with her best friend Cara Walker. Elizabeth, Jessica's twin, thinks that scheming, gossipy Cara is all wrong for Steven. She's determined to find out the reason for Tricia's strange behavior – and horrified when she discovers the awful truth.
TRIGGER WARNING: At the very end of the book, there is an abduction. I do not describe it in detail but you might want to skip the last paragraph in this recap if that's something that will distress you. (Also, you're going to want to skip the next book if that's a tough trope for you.)
Meet the Cast
*Elizabeth Wakefield – identical twin of Jessica and massive fucking martyr.
*Jessica Wakefield – identical twin of Elizabeth with narcissistic and histrionic tendencies
*Ned Wakefield – neglectful patriarch of the clan and successful lawyer
*Alice Wakefield – neglectful matriarch of the clan and an interior designer
*Steven Wakefield – older brother, university student and general asshole
*Enid Rollins – Liz's best friend and generic good-girl type
*Todd Wilkins – Liz's douchebag boyfriend and star of the SVH basketball team
*Lila Fowler – Jessica's self-absorbed best friend and representative of SV new money
*Bruce Patman – school dick and representative of SV old money
*Ken Matthews – star quarterback and resident jock stereotype
*Winston Egbert – stereotypical school nerd
There are more but these are the main characters that plague us book after book.
In the last book, Jessica and some random named Suzanne traded places for a couple of weeks. Jessica went to New York City where she learned she isn't as sophisticated as she thinks she is. She spent time with Suzanne's boyfriend and he tried to get her drunk and then assaulted her but luckily Suzanne's parents came home and stopped it in time. Back in SV, Suzanne won everyone over with her charm and then accused Mr Collins of sexual assault because she was mad that he turned down her advances. Everyone eventually learned the truth and all was well. I guess. We also learned that Tricia has been avoiding Steven which leads right into this book.
We begin with Jess finding Steven brooding in the kitchen and Pascal gives us this stunning description of the twins: “They shared the same sun-streaked golden hair and dazzling white smiles, the same delicate features and perfect size-six figures. Together they formed a double image of sun-kissed, all-American loveliness.”
She forgot about the part where they're both wretched, evil, reckless and self-absorbed. Truly, they are the personification of selfishness.
Jess asks Steven why he's moping around and then takes a few digs at Tricia who she feels is below them because her family is poor and her dad drinks too much. Steven reacts angrily to Jess's opinion of Tricia and tells her to leave him alone. She stomps away, irritated that he won't see things her way.
Liz comes in and chastises Jess for being insensitive. She says that Steven is heartbroken that Tricia has been so distant and they need to support him. Jess counters that he never should have been dating Tricia in the first place because it's super embarrassing to Jess to be associated with “that family”. This is a conversation we've heard time after time over the course of several books and I'm bored already.
Liz reminds Jess that just because Tricia's family is a mess doesn't mean that Tricia is. In addition to the drunk and disorderly father, Tricia's sister Betsy has a “bad reputation”. I'm so glad Pascal is back on the slut shaming train. It's such a fun ride.
Jess switches topics and asks Liz to borrow a pair of red shoes. Liz says 'no' because the last time Jess borrowed them, she broke a strap and it cost Liz six whole dollars to fix. Jess sighs and says she'll just have to go barefoot then and she'll step on some glass and die. Martyr Liz immediately relents and lets Jess have her shoes. And that paragraph perfectly sums up both of them.
Chapter two puts us in Steven's head. He's determined to find out what's going on with Tricia, so he just drives over to her house to confront her. He makes sure to point out to us that Tricia lives in the poor part of town and it's so very different to the luxury he's used to. I hate Steven too.
He gets to Tricia's “shabby” house and knocks on the door. Her drunk father answers and tells Steven that Tricia is in her room but she doesn't want to see him. Steven doesn't take no for an answer and he just shoves Tricia's father aside and heads back to her room. He doesn't even knock or ask permission to enter her room. He just slams open her door and barges in, demanding to know why she's been avoiding him. Tricia is startled by his sudden appearance and then a little annoyed by it. Not annoyed enough. She has a suitcase on the bed and she tells him that she's going out of town for the weekend. Steven gets shouty and demands to know where she's going but Tricia evades.
Steven grabs her by the shoulders, gripping her hard enough to make her wince. Tricia says that maybe they should see other people and he asks her if she's going away with some other guy for the weekend. This is.....awful. Steven is awful. Tricia should run far, far away. The entire Wakefield family is dangerous. Tricia doesn't say anything and Steven takes that for confirmation. He releases her and then stomps out of the house, slamming the door behind him.
We move into Tricia's head now, thank goodness. I'm so disgusted by Steven that I don't even want to think about him anymore. Tricia is shaken by the encounter. She thinks to herself that it's better this way. He'll hurt less thinking she doesn't love him than he would if he had to sit by her side and watch her die. Tricia has been diagnosed with leukemia and the doctors have given her roughly six months to live. Her mother also died of leukemia so Tricia doesn't hold out much hope for any kind of medical intervention saving her. She figures a breakup will hurt Steven less in the long run.
Like he's not going to hear that she died? Like he's not going to care that she died because she broke up with him? This is all very dumb already and we're only on chapter two. I do not have high hopes for this book.
We skip ahead to a new day. I have no idea how much time has passed. Jess and Cara are on a bus together for some reason. Cara asks if the rumors about Steven breaking up with Tricia are true and Jess confirms everything. Cara expresses interest in Steven and Jess is thrilled. She thinks this will be a much better match for her brother and she promises Cara that she'll help get the two of them together.
The plot suddenly splits off and Cara starts talking about a guy named Jeremy Frank. He's the host of a local TV program and everybody pretty much thinks he's ever so dreamy. Cara tells Jess that he skied into a tree and broke his leg so he's currently laid up at the local hospital. Jess immediately starts scheming about how she can meet him and make him fall in love with her. I think he's like 30 or something. I hate these books.
Cara also mentions that someone new is moving into one of the mansions up on the hill. Jess has always been awed by the house and is very curious who the new family might be. I don't know if they're a C-plot or if they're the next book.
(((Note from future me: it's both. The C-plot is pretty much just a line here and there but it exists.)))
Jess goes home and tells Liz that she thinks they should start volunteering at the hospital. It's all a ploy to meet Jeremy but she doesn't clue Liz in on that aspect. Liz is surprised that Jess wants to do any kind of good deed with her spare time. Liz should know Jess well enough by now to see through this sudden bout of altruism but she takes it at face value and agrees that volunteering would be a good thing for their souls and their college applications. Plus it's the B-plot so she really doesn't have much choice.
At dinner, the twins run their volunteering plan by Ned and Alice who can barely bring themselves to care. Jess asks Ned if he knows anything about the C-plot moving in and he tells her that Mr Morrow used to play football professionally and now he and his family are moving to SV. They're due to arrive the following week. They have a son Steven's age and a daughter the twins' age who will be starting SVH.
Seriously, Pascal can barely handle one plot with any degree of proficiency. I really wish she wouldn't attempt three because none of them are going to turn out well.
I say that as if any of them would turn out well if they were on their own. 😆
The next day, the twins go to the hospital to fill out the volunteer paperwork. The lady behind the desk tells them that they'll mostly be fetching water and magazines for the patients as well as delivering gifts and keeping patients company. Jess barely listens as she imagines saving Jeremy's life. She pictures herself noticing he's in distress and calling for medical intervention just in time. She's sure she's going to end up famous for this.
The level of delusion in this girl is fascinating.
Jess ends up assigned to the maternity ward which sounds like a dream to me but makes her very unhappy. By break time, she's sick of looking at babies and bitches to Liz about her assignment. Liz spent her time running things to patients and one of those patients was Jeremy. Jess listens in a jealous rage as Liz describes her conversation with him and the fact that he asked her to sign his cast. She asks Liz to switch assignments with her and that's when Liz finally figures out that Jess had an ulterior motive for volunteering.
It took her long enough.
They twins part ways again after break and Liz continues on her assignment. On her way down a hall, she encounters an orderly with dark eyes and a “hawkish” nose who immediately drops the tray he was carrying. Stuff goes everywhere. Liz rushes to help him and he introduces himself as Carl. When her fingers inadvertently touch his as she hands him a paper cup she feels “a cold shock” and thinks to herself that there's something odd about Carl.
Seriously, Pascal? You aren't really attempting a D-plot here, are you?
As Liz continues down the hall she sees the A-plot in the distance. She calls out to Tricia to remind her that she's in this book but Tricia just bolts without acknowledging her in any way. I wish I could get away with that. I'd love to go through life not acknowledging Elizabeth Wakefield in any way.
In the meantime, Jess is working on our B-plot. She sneaks onto the regular ward and heads right for Jeremy's room. He greets her warmly, thinking she's Liz but she quickly sets the record straight about that. He's still pretty cordial until she tells him that she wants to be an actress and then he shutters down pretty quick. She asks if she can sign his cast and he tells her she can. While she's leaning over to look for a space, she loses her balance and ends up stabbing him in the good knee with a pen. He jerks upright and that yanks one of the supports down for his traction. He slumps to the bed in pain and asks Jess to get a nurse for him. She's crushed, knowing she's probably ruining her only chance at love and a career.
HE'S OLD!!!
Pascal really needs to stop doing this.
Jess turns her attention back to the A-plot for a little while, remembering that she promised Cara she'd hook her up with Steven. To achieve this, she tries to get Steven to go to a party that Cara is having. Steven tells her that he's not in the mood and Jess is irritated. She tells him that he's going to ruin his reputation because everyone will think he's a “wimp” if he continues to mope around like this. Steven doesn't much care about this so Jess changes tactic. She says that Cara has been hearing a lot of juicy gossip about Tricia and how she's spending her time these days. If Steven wants to know, he needs to come to the party and ask Cara himself. For some reason, he agrees to this.
It's like Liz and Steven have never met Jess in their fucking lives. They KNOW who she is and what she's up to. Why do they allow her to manipulate them like this? I think they're both idiots.
I say that like we didn't already know it.
Turns out Cara wasn't even having a party at all and now she's panicked because she has to somehow throw one in just a few hours. She has no idea how to get people to come on such short notice but Jess says to leave everything to her.
They get to the 'party' and find that Lila and her date are the only other ones there so I guess Jess didn't even bother to handle it after all. So shocking. Cara tries to cover it up by saying a bunch of people canceled. Steve has a hint of awareness when he sees how much skin Cara is showing and regrets coming at all. He wonders what Tricia is doing at that moment and who she is doing it with. He still can't believe they broke up.
Cara reminds us that there is a C-plot by telling Jess that Regina Morrow is going to be throwing a party soon to get to know the town. Jess is annoyed she didn't hear about it first but excited about getting to go to a party at a mansion.
Cara brings out beer – which Steven refuses – and then puts on some music. Jess and her date disappear out onto the dark patio and are soon followed by Lila and her date. Steve finds himself alone with Cara who gets all up in his personal space pretty quick. She tells him that she heard about his breakup and expresses some insincere condolences about it. He asks her if she's talked to Tricia because, of course, that's what Jess had told him to get him to come to this party. Cara tells him that she's heard Tricia has a new boyfriend. A friend saw Tricia with some man at the pharmacy recently and she was “draped all over him”. Steven pretends not to care as he dies inside. He grabs Cara and tells her he wants to dance. As they're dancing, he thinks about Tricia being with another man and kisses Cara. He doesn't feel anything but she's elated.
The fake party eventually ends and Steven decides to take Cara out for pizza. She asks him to drive around a little after and he thinks it's because she wants to be seen with a prize catch like him. I swear, the ego on this guy. It must be a dominant Wakefield trait. Even though he feels nothing for Cara at all, he decides to keep dating her to stick it to Tricia. Cara is kind of awful but I feel bad for her because she actually has feelings for this douche.
On Monday, Liz sees Tricia eating lunch outside alone. She goes out to check on her and the two have an awkward conversation. Tricia tries to explain away her appearance at the hospital as visiting a friend. Liz subjects her to what can only be called an interrogation, asking her question after question about this friend and her illness. It's really invasive and absolutely none of Liz's business. Jess and Cara rock up and start talking about how Cara is dating Steve now. He's going to take her to a college party the next weekend. Liz can tell that the talk upsets Tricia even though she tries to pretend she doesn't care.
Privately, Tricia is crushed. She thinks about her first date with Steven and their first kiss. She remembers how polite he always was to her drunk father. She loves him so much it hurts and she has the impulse to call him and tell him everything that's going on because she needs his support and love to get her through. But then she decides that he's much better off without her and it will hurt less for him if he's dating Cara when Tricia dies.
It doesn't even make sense. This whole plot is so dumb.
We revisit the B-plot after school. Jess strides into Jeremy's room without knocking, a pitcher of ice water in her hands. She's determined to make up for the fact that she injured him last time. There's a nurse with him but Jess ignores that and approaches the bed. Jeremy is 100% naked getting a sponge bath and Jess is so shocked at the unexpected view of his....ahem....credentials (if you know what I mean), that she dumps the entire pitcher of ice water directly onto his stomach. Jeremy howls in pain (this is the word Pascal used) and tries helplessly to get away from the water as the nurse dabs at him with a towel. They both yell at Jess who feels like they're being way to harsh on her.
Jess tells Liz about it later and Liz realizes that she needs to do something to keep Jess away from Jeremy entirely. She knows threats won't work but historically Jess tends to lose interest in a guy as soon as they start liking her back. Liz wonders if she can get Jeremy to pretend to like Jess so that she will lose interest in him. It's a risky gamble in the first place because it could backfire so easily AND any adult who does not live in SV would never agree to do something like this. I mean, he's an adult and she's a literal child. He could get arrested. Lose his job. Canceled on Twitter. Of course, we know he'll agree to it because everyone in SV does everything the Wakefields say.
I hate this fucking town.
Liz runs into the D-plot after break. She notices that Carl is watching her and tells us that she's caught him doing that several times. It makes her uncomfortable and he definitely gives her the creeps. She asks one of the nurses about him and finds out that Carl is a loner who lives on the edge of town. I'm not feeling better about Carl but Liz seems to think a friendship with her is all he really needs. She still can't shake the prey feeling he gives her but chooses not to listen to that little bit of intuition.
Is Carl the next book? I bet he is.
Just a little public service announcement...... If you ever come across someone that makes you feel like prey, don't try to befriend them. There's a reason you feel that way. Liz is an idiot.
Liz ropes Jeremy into “Operation Hurricane” somehow. He must be as dumb as all the others. His first strike is to give Jess a dozen roses that someone from the TV station sent him. Jess thinks this is the first step for their love story. She admits that Ned and Alice might have a problem with their 16-year-old daughter dating a 25-year-old man. I doubt Ned and Alice will even notice but the local police department might have a lot to say about it. I hate everything about the B-plot.
Liz goes to visit a new patient and is shocked to discover it's Tricia. Tricia admits that she has terminal leukemia and makes Liz promise not to tell Steven. Liz protests that Steve would want to be there for Tricia but she continues to insist that “it's better this way”. Liz promises but feels miserable about it. Tricia tells Liz that she really loves Steven but she thinks it will be easier on him if she dies while he's mad at her. This girl knows nothing about emotions and grief. It's actually going to be WAY harder on him because he has all these other feelings mixed up in it now and he was cheated out of spending time with her. I hate everything about the A-plot.
A week passes. Liz is tormented by this secret she's been asked to keep. She feels like it's destroying both Tricia and her brother. In desperation, she turns to the questionable Mr Collins for advice. He listens and then tells her what I've been saying all along – that this will only hurt Steven more in the long run. He tells Liz that sometimes people make a “bad promise” because they aren't aware of all the information or ramifications and that they don't have to keep the promise in these instances. It's actually pretty good advice and I'm a little surprised.
He also ruins everything by introducing a fucking E-plot. Yeah. Pascal shoved a 5th plot line into a book where she is handling 0 plot lines well. This is just ridiculous at this point. Anyway, Max is in danger of failing English and he wants Liz to tutor him. We met Max a few books ago. He's a member of that band that thought they were getting their big break when they were only being scammed.
I'm so over all these plots.
Back to the B-plot. Jeremy asks Jess to come see him. When she does, he immediately proposes. It freaks her out and she panics, protesting that she's only 16 and still in high school. He says he'll wait but she tells him she doesn't love him and flees the room with a “frightened” cry. He literally scared her. That's not cool. None of this is cool. I hope this plot is over now because it's disgusting.
We skip ahead to the weekend. Steven is taking Cara to some kind of college party even though his heart isn't in it. They dance and she invites him to Regina's party the next weekend. He hedges, saying he'll get back to her on it. The lack of enthusiasm pricks at her and she tells him he needs to show her more affection now that they're a couple. Stupid Steven tells her that he wasn't aware they were dating which is just.....I can't even with these people.....you've been taking her out on dates, Steven. What do you think dating means? She's upset but he tells her that he's still in love with Tricia and then he takes her home.
Meanwhile, Jess has gotten over her panic and she decides that she's going to accept Jeremy's proposal after all. She figures they can have a long engagement and she'll keep it a secret from her parents until she graduates. She heads to the hospital to surprise Jeremy.
Damn it. The B-plot resurfaced. Just when I thought it was safe to read another chapter.......
Jess goes to Jeremy's hospital room and tells him that she's going to accept his proposal after all. The asshole literally laughs at her until he cries. He tells her that he and Liz cooked up this scheme to scare Jess away and she's hurt that they'd both do something so awful. She starts to cry even as she's thinking in her head that there's probably a way she can get something out of this. Jeremy finally feels bad for his appalling behavior and asks her if there's something he can do to make it up to her.
Sigh.
Steven comes home from the party feeling glum. Liz decides now is the time to tell him everything so she goes to his room and fills him in. He immediately leaves to go to Tricia's house. I guess she's out of the hospital now??? When she answers the door, she tries to tell him that she's waiting for her new boyfriend to arrive but he says “Trish, baby, I know” and she collapses into his arms, sobbing.
They talk it all out and she explains her reasoning and he explains why her reasoning sucks. She decides that it's better to have him with her and they say “I love you” a bunch of times and kiss over and over. So I guess that's pretty much wrapped up.
I know. I've said that before.
The conclusion of the B-plot barely gets a mention. I guess Jess appeared on a segment of Jeremy's show or something.
(((THIS IS THE LAST PARAGRAPH. PLEASE STOP READING HERE IF THE TRIGGER WARNING APPLIES TO YOU.)))
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We move back to the C, D, and E plots now. Liz is scheduled to work a shift at the hospital, then go tutor Max, then go to Regina's party with Jess. As she's walking across the parking lot of the hospital, she keeps thinking that someone is following her. After she gets in her car, she hears a tap on her window and sees Carl standing there. He tells her that one of the nurses needs to talk to her before she leaves and Liz gets out of the car. He immediately kidnaps her and I'm not going to go into detail about how that happened out of respect for one of my readers in case she ignored my trigger warning as she so often does. Carl tells Liz that they'll be together forever and then the book ends.
Coming up next: The D and E plots combine in a very peculiar way. ((That's tutoring Max and the Carl thing in case you lost track. I had to write them down so I'd remember them. I hate Pascal.))
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