**This blog contains adult language.**
Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!! This is a recap blog which means I read the book and tell you everything that happens so you don't have to read it yourself. Do NOT continue to read unless you want to know what cold-hearted-bitch move the twins made this book.
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From the Back of the Book: A winter wonderland... Winter's here and everyone at Sweet Valley High is excited about the upcoming Winter Carnival. It's a very special weekend at a mountain ski resort, with ice skating, skiing, sledding and a spectacular ball. But Elizabeth Wakefield's got the midwinter blues. She's especially upset with her twin, Jessica, who's been avoiding chores and borrowing clothes without asking. Elizabeth is so sick and tired of Jessica's inconsiderate attitude that she sometimes wishes she never had a sister! And when Jessica's string of broken promises threatens to destroy Elizabeth's romance with Jeffrey French, it looks as though Winter Carnival will turn into a snowy disaster!
It's really weird that Liz wishes she never had a sister when she spent all last book crying because Jess dyed her fucking hair.
Meet the Cast
*Elizabeth Wakefield – identical twin of Jessica and massive fucking martyr.
*Jessica Wakefield – identical twin of Elizabeth with narcissistic and histrionic tendencies
*EvilNed Wakefield – neglectful patriarch of the clan and successful lawyer
*VileAlice Wakefield – neglectful matriarch of the clan and an interior designer
*Steven Wakefield – older brother, university student and general asshole
*Enid Rollins – Liz's best friend and generic good-girl type
*Todd Wilkins – Liz's douchebag former boyfriend currently exiled to Vermont
*Lila Fowler – Jessica's self-absorbed best friend and representative of SV new money
*Bruce Patman – school dick and representative of SV old money
*Winston Egbert – stereotypical school nerd
*Jeffrey French – Liz's new victim....I mean love interest
There are more but these are the main characters that plague us book after book.
This book was published in 1986 and this is my first time reading it. It's another Super Edition which means it largely takes place in an alternate universe. I'm not expecting anything that happens in this book to ever be mentioned again. The cover is what it is. I still think these twins look like soccer moms.
In the last book, Jess dyed her hair in an effort to make people see her as an individual and not just as an extension of Liz. Liz couldn't handle them not being identical and spent the entire book crying that she didn't feel like a whole person anymore. It was weird. And annoying.
Missing, Presumed Dead: Not available for Super Editions
Released From the Wakefield Dungeon: See above.
We begin with Liz walking home from school on a rainy winter day because she missed the bus and Jess has the car. The ghostie wastes zero time in describing the twins to us. Physically perfect in every way, blah, blah, blah. Liz is described as dependable, loyal, steady and hardworking which are all bald-faced lies. For Jess, the ghostie merely says her favorite word is “change”. I'm sure the ghosties get these character descriptions from Pascal in her outline but it's stunning how wrong they always get Liz. Pascal just can't admit that Liz is a monster.
Liz is irritated because Jess left the school on urgent cheerleader business without checking to see if Liz needed a ride home first. Despite the fact that she cried constantly in the last book about feeling like she wasn't a twin because Jess dyed her hair, Liz tells us that she's tired of having a twin sister. THIS MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE. I get that maybe this book was being written at the same time as the last one by a different ghostie but you'd think Pascal would be aware that having these two plot lines in consecutive books was asinine. It just makes Liz look really dumb.
Liz has the midwinter blues but she's looking forward to the winter carnival – an annual event for the juniors and seniors at SVH that's held at a nearby ski lodge. It will be a weekend full of winter activities in the actual snow instead of the dreary rain in Sweet Valley.
On a side note, Liz tells us that Steven is going to be attending this high school event and it's not as a chaperone. He's coming because he's dating a minor. I can't believe the school would allow one of the students to bring their adult boyfriend on a weekend student trip. Todd is also coming which makes even less sense.
We're immediately handed a B-plot. Liz and Enid are trying out for some kind of trivia contest. Winners are chosen at random from the pool of teams who answer the application questions correctly and then one team from SVH and one team from some other high school will compete against each other to see who will compete on TV. Even though the selection process is random, Liz is confident that she and Enid will be picked because Queen Liz is never told 'no'.
To her utter shock and horror, Jess comes home to announce that she and Amy have been selected to represent SVH. Liz is furious. She knows that if she were picked instead of Jess, Jess would pester her until she gave up her spot. She thinks this means that Jess should give up her spot. Which is never going to happen. Jess isn't a martyr, Liz. That's all you. Liz feels betrayed by Jess and Amy both and she cries AGAIN.
We go back to the A-plot. Todd asks Liz if she'd be willing to miss the first night of the carnival to go to a banquet with him. When he lived in SV he participated in the Big Brother program and the kid he used to mentor is getting some kind of award. He's been invited to the banquet to watch and he wants Liz to be his guest. Which makes very little sense. They're really reaching for plots here. Liz hasn't told Jeffrey about this because he's “possessive” of her and “irrational about her friendship with Todd”.
I knew they'd fucking ruin Jeffrey sooner or later. Sigh.
Liz makes excuses for his red flags because we'd hate to actually send a good message about healthy relationships and respecting boundaries in one of these books. Plus possessive men are just so hot, am I right?
That was sarcasm if you couldn't tell.
So Liz agrees to go with Todd but doesn't bother to tell Jeffrey because she's not looking forward to his reaction.
Sounds healthy.
The next day, Jess comes to Liz with more exciting news. The cheerleading squad has been nominated for All State. Instead of being happy and proud of her sister, Liz is bitter because things are going so well for Jess. She literally tells us that she's jealous of Jess' successes.
Want to gaslight us some more about how loving and supportive Liz is, Pascal?
Later, Creepy Mr Collins tells Liz that she got an honorable mention in an essay contest she entered. Liz is crushed that she didn't win anything. It makes her even more bitter about the good things that have happened to Jess lately. She whines some more about how hard it is to be Jess' sister. Jess gets all the attention and she never does her share of the chores. She really resents the hell out of Jess.
Maybe she should dye her hair.
Jeffrey notices that Liz is a little down so he invites her out to dinner. It's Jess' turn to cook so Liz is free to go. When she gets home, however, she finds a note from Jess saying that she's studying trivia with Amy and won't be home for dinner. Liz is pissed because she's going to have to cancel on Jeffrey to make dinner for her two adult parents who are more than capable of feeding themselves.
Look, I know you're thinking what I'm thinking. She doesn't have to cancel her date. She can go and let Jess face the consequences for not doing her chore. But that wouldn't allow Liz to be the martyr and it's her very favorite role to play. She basically teaches Jess how to treat her and then gets pissed when Jess learns.
When Liz calls Jeffrey to cancel, he basically says all the things I just said. Liz gets super pissed at him because he just doesn't understand.
VileAlice comes home with a stunning silver lycra ski suit for Jess. She pretty much tells Liz straight to her face that she looked for something for Liz to wear too but couldn't find anything boring enough. Liz fondles the ski suit and wishes that she was “fun” like her sister. Honestly, so do I. I much prefer Jess. At least she's honest about who she is.
When Jess comes home, Liz yells at her for being inconsiderate and taking advantage of Liz's martyr complex. Jess apologizes and promises to do better.
This B-plot is super boring, by the way. Jess and Amy study trivia. Jess meets a member of the competing team somehow and starts to date him. His name is David but I wouldn't bother to learn it. We'll never hear it again after this book.
Remember Eddie?
Neither does Pascal.
Pascal needs another reason for Jess to be inconsiderate and Liz to be mad, so she presents us with the dumbest situation ever. Creepy Mr Collins is out of town so his sister is babysitting little Teddy. Said sister doesn't drive. Teddy is at a birthday party and will need a ride home. Liz has volunteered to give him the ride but, for some reason, Mr Collins didn't tell her where the party was or when it was supposed to end. Instead, she has to wait beside the phone for the parent of the birthday boy to call her and give her directions so she can pick up Teddy. Liz, despite being described as incredibly dependable repeatedly in this series, doesn't want to wait by the phone even though she's promised to do so. She wants to play tennis with Jeffrey. So she asks Jess to take a message when the birthday boy's dad calls. Jess has a date of her own but won't leave until after Liz is done playing tennis so Liz figures she has it covered and takes off.
David arrives early, sending Jess into a flustered panic. The phone rings as she's trying to gather her stuff but she answers it and takes down the address where Teddy is waiting for dependable, absent Liz. In her hurry to grab her purse, etc, she accidentally takes the phone message with her. She discovers it at the restaurant and immediately calls home but there is no answer. Where is dependable Liz you ask? Who the fuck knows.
When Jess gets home, Liz is mega pissed. She yells at Jess for not giving her the message that she was supposed to wait for herself. Jess explains what happened and apologizes but Liz is having none of it. She screams that Jess is self-centered and stomps away.
Sorry, but if dependable Liz had done what she promised Creepy Mr Collins she would do, none of this would have happened.
Teddy obviously made it home safe and sound. Birthday boy's dad drove him.
Todd calls Saturday afternoon but Liz is out with Jeffrey again so Jess takes the message. He's calling to confirm that Liz is going to the banquet with him the following Friday. After getting screamed at the night before, Jess is taking no chances with this message. She rushes right to the diner to give it to Liz. Liz is embarrassed because she still hasn't told Jeffrey about it. Jeffrey is pissed that she hid it from him and wonders if she did so because she still has feelings for Todd.
That's kind of valid. I would wonder the same thing if my significant other hid something like that.
Liz thinks Jeffrey is being unreasonably jealous. He thinks she's being sneaky and underhanded.
I go back and forth on whether Jeffrey is being unreasonable or not. He's very insecure about Todd but I can see how that would happen when the whole fucking town never shuts up about what a golden couple Liz and Todd were. Liz herself reminds us in almost every book that the love she had with Todd was very intense and special and that they only broke up because he moved away. I can see why Jeffrey is uneasy about the two of them going to dinner together. BUT....while I get the insecurity and the uneasiness, he also has to trust Liz to do the right thing or their relationship is based on nothing. Having said this, I don't think it's necessarily wise to trust Liz when she absolutely cheated on Todd a couple of times. Jeffrey's feelings might be extremely valid in this particular situation while being a red flag in a more general way. Does that make sense?
When Liz tells Jess about what happened, Jess advises Liz to play it cool with Jeffrey and make him worry a bit. It's never a good thing to play games in a relationship. Jess has never even had a relationship last longer than one book so I'm not sure why Liz is listening to her but she does. Of course, it makes things worse and gives Liz another reason to be annoyed at Jess. She should be annoyed at herself for not using her fucking brain.
Enid agrees that Jeffrey is being “overpossessive” (which I don't even think is a word, Pascal) by not wanting Liz to go to dinner with Todd but she thinks he just needs a little reassurance. Again, in this particular case she's absolutely right. Jeffrey has no issues with Liz having male friends or spending time with other guys in general. He simply worries about her spending time with the great love of her life. He does need a little reassurance that Liz doesn't have romantic feelings for Todd anymore. BUT...the language Pascal keeps using is VERY strong. She uses words like “irrational” and “overpossessive” (which isn't even a real word) to describe how he's acting. If a man is truly being overly possessive and irrational then you shouldn't try to “fix” him with reassurance. You should get the hell away before something very bad happens. I don't like the message Pascal is sending in this book written for young girls.
Jeffrey asks Liz to skip the banquet to come to the opening night of the carnival with him. He doesn't understand why she would rather spend time with her ex than with him. He believes she should prioritize his feelings over Todd's. Liz gets pissed that he's acting so jealous and screams at him that she'd rather spend the night with Todd because he's better company. Jeffrey is devastated because it confirms all his internal feelings that Liz will never love him as much as she loved Todd.
And because Pascal needs another fucking plot contrivance to make Jess look like an asshole, we get the second ridiculous scenario of the book. Jeffrey leaves a note in Liz's locker telling her he's going up to the canyon to think. He wants her to join him so they can talk things out. If she doesn't get there by six, he'll “assume the worst”. Now this is a HUGE dick move on Jeffrey's part. For all he knows, she never found the note. Or maybe she has to run errands for her horrible parents and won't be done in time. Or maybe she doesn't always have access to a fucking car. This is just a dumb scenario and I kind of hate Pascal more for pulling this shit.
Naturally Jess is using the Fiat that afternoon because she's going to her trivia competition which is very important to her and to Amy. Liz asks her when she thinks she'll be done with the car and Jess says around 4:30. Liz makes her promise to come straight home.
Jess and Amy somehow win the competition which means they'll appear on TV. The producer wants to take them and the other team out for pizza and Jess is so excited that she forgets Liz needs the car. She doesn't get home until after six. Liz screams at her for being so inconsiderate and untrustworthy. Jess does tend to be both those things but this is all Jeffrey's fault for issuing the world's worse ultimatum.
Liz is despondent because now she and Jeffrey are broken up over her inability to get to the canyon on time. I cannot even express to you how incredibly dumb this is. SHE COULD JUST CALL HIM AND EXPLAIN WHY SHE DIDN'T MEET HIM THERE! HE KNOWS SHE AND JESS SHARE A CAR! She doesn't bother to do so, however, because she's “too embarrassed and upset”.
Jess decides that she has to fix things. She figures if she can get Todd out of the picture (unfortunately not in a permanent way) then Liz and Jeffrey will make up. She arranges to meet up with him as soon as he steps foot in SV. She tells Todd that Liz and Jeffrey are having problems because of the banquet and Todd is instantly distressed. He decides to “uninvite” Liz so that she'll go to the opening night of the carnival instead. He drives right over to the compound and tells Liz that she doesn't need to go to the banquet with him after all. She's stunned that he doesn't want to spend the evening with her.
Jess is surprised when eliminating the banquet issue doesn't automatically fix Liz and Jeffrey's relationship. She decides more drastic measures are in order. She writes Jeffrey a note asking him to meet her in the lodge at 6:30 because she'd rather spend the evening with him than Todd and then signs Liz's name to it. She leaves the note in Jeffrey's locker and then runs to pick up Amy so they can catch the bus up to the lodge together. She figures she'll tell Liz about the note (and the fact that Liz should be there at 6:30 to meet Jeffrey) on the bus ride but Amy isn't packed and they end up missing the bus.
Jess drives them to the lodge in the Fiat but gets there too late to find Liz. Her only option is to meet Jeffrey herself and pretend to be her sister. Jeffrey falls for it....somehow....and forgives “Liz” when she explains that she couldn't get to the canyon because Jess had the car. He even admits that he was being unreasonable about the banquet. When he tries to kiss her, Jess dodges and says she has to go unpack. Unfortunately, they were seen.
Some random person that I've never heard of before and will probably never hear of again, goes to tell Liz that Jeffrey and Jess were flirting it up in the lobby. Liz is so hurt that she immediately repacks her suitcase and decides to go home. Ken drives her to the bus stop and leaves her there. She's sitting there waiting when Cara and Steven arrive. They try to talk her into staying but she refuses.
Pascal.....I have one fucking question. How are Steven and Cara going to get up to the lodge? They don't have a car. No one else is there to drive them up. What's the plan here?
Liz makes it back to the house only to find it empty. The phone rings and it's Jess. She tries to explain things to Liz but Liz won't listen. She tells Jess that she wishes she never had a sister and then hangs up.
I still can't believe they had the unmitigated gall to do this story line right after an entire book about how Liz couldn't cope with Jess being a little distant.
Liz sulks around until the phone rings again. This time it's a police officer calling to tell her Jess was in a terrible accident on her way back to SV. She's in the hospital but they don't think she's going to make it. Liz runs outside, thinking she'll ask a neighbor for a ride but Todd conveniently drives by her house right at that second. She doesn't know why he's there because he's supposed to be at the banquet, but she explains things to him and he takes her right to the hospital.
When Liz arrives, the nurse tells her that her parents are already there. Which makes no sense. This was the beforetimes when cell phones weren't a thing. There's no way they could have been contacted when Liz didn't even know where they were. A doctor comes out to tell Liz that Jess is dead. Liz faints.
Do these assholes really expect us to believe they killed off Jessica Motherfucking Wakefield?
Even when I was 12 I wouldn't have been that dumb.
The Wakefields go home. EvilNed starts chain smoking and glaring at Liz because she reminds him of Jess.
A week passes. VileAlice repaints Jess' room white and installs new carpet to make it into a guest room. She tells Liz that she still can't believe someone with as much life as Jess could be dead.
I can't believe it either.
Enid hosts a gathering to remember Jess and all of SVH attends. The ones not currently in the dungeon at least. Todd is also there. Jeffrey isn't happy about it and the two of them start arguing. The arguing leads to a physical fight..........and then Liz wakes up.
Jeffrey and Jess are calling her name. Liz starts hysterically crying and hugging a very confused Jess. Cara and Steven are there too. Jeffrey drove them all down because he was so worried about Liz traveling by bus alone. Liz recaps the entire book for everyone and then tells them about her awful dream. Everyone makes up and all is well in the land of Wakefield.
They all drive back up to the lodge the next morning and arrive in time to participate in all the snowy activities. That night they go to the ball. Liz is wearing a silver dress with a round neck and puffy elbow-length sleeves. She feels “wonderfully glamorous”. I wish I could picture things because this dress sounds so freakishly 80's.
The book ends with Liz vowing never to regret having a twin again.
My flabber is still all kinds of ghasted that they put these two books back-to-back. What were they thinking? It's so jarring to have Liz do a complete about face like that. Pascal really needs to do better.
