All Night Long (SVH #5) by Francine Pascal

 **This blog contains adult language.**

Warning: Spoilers Ahead!!!  This is a recap blog which means I read the book and tell you everything that happens so you don't have to read it yourself.  Do NOT continue to read unless you want to know what cold-hearted-bitch-move the twins made this book.


Tag Line: Is Jessica as grown-up as she thinks she is?

From the Back of the Book: Has Jessica gone too far?  Elizabeth Wakefield knows her beautiful twin can handle almost any guy - most boys are just no match for Jessica's seductive charms.  But Scott Daniels, Jessica's latest love is more man than boy, much older and much more experienced than anyone Jessica's ever dated.  When Jessica sneaks off to a college beach party with Scott, Elizabeth's afraid of what could happen.  And when her twin isn't back by morning, Elizabeth's fear turns to alarm.  Where's Jessica?  Why has she stayed out all night long?

This book was published in 1984 and this is my first time reading it. Can we talk about this cover though? Wow. Did they look for the creepiest guy imaginable for this or what? That pornstache is on another level. Also, why is Jessica just half wearing her shirt all crooked like that? It looks super weird.

Meet the Cast

*Elizabeth Wakefield – identical twin of Jessica and massive fucking martyr.

*Jessica Wakefield – identical twin of Elizabeth with narcissistic and histrionic tendencies

*Ned Wakefield – neglectful patriarch of the clan and successful lawyer

*Alice Wakefield – neglectful matriarch of the clan and an interior designer

*Steven Wakefield – older brother, university student and general asshole

*Enid Rollins – Liz's best friend and generic good-girl type

*Todd Wilkins – Liz's douchebag boyfriend and star of the SVH basketball team

*Lila Fowler – Jessica's self-absorbed best friend and representative of SV new money

*Bruce Patman – school dick and representative of SV old money

*Ken Matthews – star quarterback and resident jock stereotype

*Winston Egbert – stereotypical school nerd

There are more but these are the main characters that plague us book after book.

In the last book, the entire school tortures Robin over her weight until she gets skinny and then everyone loves her. It was a dumpster fire and I refuse to even link it here for you to review. I want to forget it ever happened.

We begin with Jess planning to go to a party with some guy named Scott. Pascal tries to make the case that when Jess is being mischievous her eyes are green and when she's being innocent her eyes are blue. I'm not sure Pascal knows how eye color works. Anyway, Jess has been forbidden to go to this lake party because it will be full of college kids but she's not letting that stop her. She's planning to tell her mother that she's with her friend Cara and it will probably work because Alice rarely pays any attention to her kids whatsoever. Liz doesn't think Jess should go because the crowd is too “fast” but Jess just makes fun of Liz for being a grandmother.

#okayboomer

Apparently the twins have some test the morning after this party to get their tourist guide licenses. If they pass, they'll be able to make summer money giving tours of Sweet Valley. Liz thinks Jess should stay home and prepare for the test but Jess says she can handle it. She asks Liz to cover for her if Alice happens to ask where she is but Liz says she won't lie for Jess. Jess bursts into tears and says that sisters are supposed to stick up for each other and Liz feels bad. As usual.

(((I thought that maybe school was already out for the summer since they were taking their tourist guide tests on a Monday morning but, no.  Apparently these tests for a summer job are being given at the school during school hours.  It's weird.  Anyway, back to the story.)))

Instead of going to the party at the lake, Liz, Enid and Todd head to the beach for the afternoon. Liz is fretting about potentially being put on the spot by Alice later but not so much that she doesn't notice some surf god out on the waves. Todd says his name is Sonny and he's a shoe-in to win some surfing competition. Liz muses that Bill will be upset about that and for some reason I can't even remember who Bill is. Did we meet him already? I have no clue. Liz describes him as a loner without many friends so maybe he's new? {{{shrug}}}

Chapter two has us hopping into Jess's head at the party. She's feeling a little out of place among the college crowd but doing her best to hide it. The boys are all in the water goofing off but Jess and most of the girls are laying around on the ground working on their tans. One of them warns Jess that Scott has a reputation around campus but before she can ask if it's any worse than hers, Scott rocks up to interrupt the conversation. He nuzzles Jess's neck and his pornstache tickles the inside of her ear. I might have died a little inside just now. She teases him a little and he gets pretty aggressive with her, pushing her onto her back and kissing her hard. She knows she's okay with all the girls around but worries about what might happen when they're alone.

Um.

You shouldn't be worried about that, Jess. You should be confident that he will respect your boundaries and only act with consent. The fact that you aren't tells me that you shouldn't be with him at all.

Beer is broken out and a joint makes the rounds. Jess pretends she wants to wash her feet off so she can get out of there without having to say 'no' to the marijuana like a punk-ass baby. Scott catches up with her and tells her he wants to take a walk. He's been drinking and he's had a couple of hits off the joint so Jess thinks it will be okay. Because............? I guess she thinks he's too high to cause trouble? I don't know. This makes no sense to me at all.

Scott leads them to some kind of a boat house in the woods.  Because people often park their boats in the middle of woods.  As they walk, he keeps putting his hand down her bikini bottom even though she repeatedly removes it. Inside the structure, he makes a full court press and she dodges to get away from him. Unfortunately, she trips and falls and he takes that as an invite to get on top of her and start untying her bikini strings. Jess is worried because she's always been able to handle boys but “Scott was more of a man than a boy, she realized with rising panic. Someone who wasn't about to take no from a girl who led him on.”

Pascal.

Seriously.

I just want to talk.  Loud and with my fists.

Jess tells him to stop but he ignores that. She says she'll scream and he tells her that no one will come to help her if she does. She tries to charm her way out of it and then she asks him to take her home but he tells her the party is an all-nighter and if she needs to go home, she'll just have to find her own way. He leaves and she's left to retie her bikini.

Jess immediately gets lost in the woods and starts cursing the fact that she dropped out of girl scouts because that kind of training might have helped her. Bitch, my child was in scouts and all they learned to do was sell cookies and be friendly. She's bitter that Liz didn't make her stay in scouts and so the whole incident becomes Liz's fault. As usual. She eventually finds her way to a cabin. To her surprise, the party has been relocated here. Scott tells her that no one will take her home until morning so she might as well get comfortable. Then he passes out cold. Jess resigns herself to her fate and tries to think up excuses her mom might buy for her being out all night.

Liz wakes up on Monday morning just 30 minutes before she has to be at school. She goes to make sure Jess is up and finds that her sister didn't sleep in her bed. It scares Liz at first but then she just gets angry and decides that Jess can just find her way out of this situation. THE GIRL IS 16 YEARS OLD AND SHE DIDN'T COME HOME LAST NIGHT. TELL YOUR FUCKING PARENTS!!!! Not that they'll care. But seriously, Liz doesn't know if Jess is in some kind of serious trouble here. The fact that she just shrugs it off disturbs me greatly.  Jess eventually calls and let's Liz know that she's okay but Liz didn't know that for a good long time and still did nothing.  In the end, she decides to cover for Jess because to do otherwise would ruin her entire martyr persona.

Liz makes an appearance as herself, leaves, sneaks back in, changes into Jess's clothes and then makes an appearance as Jess. Distracted Alice doesn't even notice. Liz is stuck in Jess's clothes at school, though, and Enid almost refuses to talk to her. Before class, Todd tells her that he's finally saved up enough money for his motorcycle. Liz is conflicted. She's happy for him but her parents' most strict rule is that their daughters never ride on a motorcycle. Seems like a weird thing to be strict about when they don't even know where their daughters are half the time but whatevs.

Liz is fretting about Jess missing her tourist guide test and considers just taking it for her since their tests are staggered an hour apart. Todd thinks it's a bad idea and points out that Jess uses Liz too much but Liz feels guilty. Because.....reasons. I can't figure Liz out at all. She gets pissed at Todd and tells him that he's only being such an ass because he doesn't like Jess. I mean, Todd's an ass all the time but okay. He tells her that she's too easy on her sister and she yells at him that he's calling her a cheat and an idiot. Which.....no?  Not really.  For some reason this leads them to break up and I. Am. Confusion.

I seriously have no idea what happened there. I guess Pascal needed some more conflict but that was just dumb.

Liz ends up taking the test for Jess but she's pretty sure she failed even though it was the exact same questions, just worded a little different. She was so broken up over her fight with Todd that she just blanked. Enid tries to comfort her but I don't know why. She shouldn't have been taking the test for Jess in the first place. Liz sobs about Jess not being a tourist guide and Todd never talking to her again. Enid tries to soothe her but it's pretty clear that Enid thinks Liz fucked all this up herself. 

#teamEnid

Mr Collins (the semi-inappropriate journalism teacher) asks Liz to cover the surfing competition that weekend because their usual sports guy will be on another assignment. Liz is thrilled to have any chance at at byline. Collins offers to give her a ride home because she “looks pale” but Liz says she needs the fresh air and will walk. As she's leaving the school, Jess finally comes in. She complains to Liz about Scott being a douche and then bounds off to cheer practice without a care in the world.

And that, dear readers, is the last time we hear about Scott at all.  Wasn't this book supposed to be about him and Jess?  I'm so confused.  Again.

A week passes and Liz and Todd have not patched things up. The world weeps. The tour guide test results are posted. Liz passed but “Jess” did not. Jess thinks Liz bombed the test on purpose because she was jealous. Liz points out that she never should have been taking the test for Jess in the first place but Jess waves that off. That doesn't matter. All that matters is that Liz betrayed her for some selfish reason. Liz doesn't bother to defend herself because that would just ruin her martyr complex. She feels awful about not passing the test for Jess.

Liz goes outside to sit on the bleachers and mope. Todd rocks up and says he doesn't really want to apologize because he feels like they were equally wrong in the situation (WRONG! IT WAS ALL LIZ.). He just wants to call a truce and move on because he misses and loves Liz. She misses and loves him too, so she agrees to just forget the last week ever happened and they make out. I guess that's all wrapped up now.

Jess ends up getting a retest because she told them she'd been sick during the test or something. It's backed up by the fact that she missed all her classes that day so it looks legit. She apologizes to Liz about blowing up on her and that's wrapped up too.

We skip to the surfing competition on Saturday. It turns out Bill has been skipping school to practice on his new surfboard (sold to him by Todd who needed the money for his motorcycle). The competition starts. Sonny has more speed and power but Bill has more grace and style. Bill ends up winning by six points. Jessica doesn't attend because she's come down with poison oak from her trek through the woods back in chapter two.

Wait.

She didn't show symptoms for OVER A WEEK? Is that even possible? I'm going to Google.

Okay, it says that most cases appear within 24-48 hours after exposure, but in rare cases it can be 6 days. I still feel like it's been way too long.

The book suddenly ends by setting up the next book. Todd will be getting his motorcycle the next Friday and he wants Liz to take a ride with him on Saturday. She still hasn't told him her parents have forbidden her to ride.

So this book was a waste of a tree. Nothing really happened. It said it was about Jess and Scott but he was gone by the end of chapter two and never really mentioned again. Liz and Todd broke up and got back together a chapter later but otherwise this was really a non-entry in the series. I only took three-and-a-half pages of notes. Why did Pascal even bother with this one? At least Enid came back.